You may have had the great honour of being asked to best man at your friend’s wedding, and while this will include organising a stag party to celebrate the last throws of him being a bachelor, it also means writing and presenting the best man’s speech. This is one area that can give you sleepless nights.
The pressure is on to be humorous and memorable without offending the audience (the line between the two is precariously thin) while avoiding turning the speech into a laborious drunken ramble of inappropriate and embarrassing stories. To help you create a best man’s speech that is remembered for all the right reasons, here are some tips to help you create a great speech.
Prepare
Do not think that you can simply turn up on the day and say a few choice words. Preparing a speech takes time! Begin your preparations a couple of months before the wedding. Think about some anecdotes that you have about the groom that highlight the points of his character – you want to show him in a good light, and while stories of past conquests may be amusing for you, think about how the bride and her family may react to hearing of his past.
Things to avoid:
- Never refer to previous lovers
- Swearing
- Controversial topics
- Narcissism – this is not your big day, it is about the relationship between the groom and the bride, not your relationship with the groom, so avoid inside jokes.
A good best man’s speech includes humour and gentle digs about the groom but should also include a similar number of compliments and express optimism. The speech must be entertaining even to even the people that don’t know the characters that are involved in the story.
Things to include:
- Compliment the bride
- How compatible the couple is
- Upbeat anecdotes
- Family anecdotes – remember a wedding is the unification of two families, and they will love being presented in a good light!
If you are struggling for inspiration, go online and search on YouTube – there are thousands of clips of speeches that will give you ideas for your speech. One way to really impress a crowd is to use an online video maker to create a short film that can be played during your speech. You can time the clips to coincide with the words that you are speaking – perhaps demonstrating the groom’s lack of dancing abilities, or even dire football skills – the world is your oyster!
Stay sober
Weddings are a great day of celebration, and your natural inclination will be to join in, however, not only do you have best man duties to perform, but you also need to make your speech, so it is wise to postpone your alcohol intake. You do not want to say anything that you shouldn’t or lose your confidence altogether. You need to be on the ball to respond to the audience’s reaction to the words that you are saying; to pause while people are laughing rather than ploughing through your speech.
Try and learn the first few lines of your speech off by heart so that can look up and engage with the audience, when you are reading the rest of your speech, look up and give people eye contact. People only tend to remember the last things they hear, so make sure that your closing statement ends on a positive that celebrates the mutual love that the couple have. Most importantly, enjoy it!