When that piece of official looking medical post plops on your door mat you may experience a little frisson of fear. What do they want me for this time, you wonder. And then you open it and find it is time for your periodic mammogram check.
Panic. It hurt like hell last time and it will hurt like hell this time you think. There is no way that squashing ones prize orbs is going to be a walk in the park. So you dutifully log the date in your diary and then trot along to the mobile caravan located in the car park of your local clinic or supermarket – fearing the moment that you expose your prized assets to be manhandled – or should that be woman-handled - into a scary-looking machine.
But – things have changed. No longer do they use the ‘up and down’ painful squashing apparatus, but a new ‘sideways’, more gentle piece of kit. Undressed to the waist I submissively stood whilst a female technician manoeuvred my boobs onto the plate, placed my hands – one to my side, and the other on a handle at the machine. I felt as if I was in a production line, a piece of inanimated meat, being dispassionately moved into place - and then told to keep very still whilst the pictures were taken. A second position ensued before the process was repeated for the other boob.
I held my breath – waiting for the painful squash, as my memory told me the plate would clamp down, and then down again to obtain the best picture possible to find any nasties that may be lurking in my mammaries. But the pain never came. There was no discomfort in the process that took only a few seconds. And no embarrassment either. These women know what they are doing. They’re doing it all day, every day. They understand that we females are often full of trepidation and they treat the process as though you are just going for the most normal procedure in the world. Which, of course, it really is. And important too.
According to Cancer Research UK it's estimated that the NHS breast screening programme saves over 1,000 lives each year.
So ladies, don’t make a boob and put off going for your appointment - the discomfort is minimal and much less than it once was – and it could save your life!
I WAS AWAKE FOR MY OPERATION!
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